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| I've been back for nearly a year now. The reality of not going to Japan has set in, and my eyes have turned toward seminary. Financial concerns burden me greatly at present, but I think those would not be as pressing if I would focus on the studies I desire to do. I've been working two jobs-- Jimmy John's and Taco Bell-- but I think it's finally time to try to get a "real" job. I'd at least like to get something like an overnight front desk job at a hotel. It might not pay the greatest, but I'd have time to read and study while I worked, I think. That would be a great blessing, so I'm praying to that end. However, if I could get a job that would pay well, that would probably be wiser. Studying in preparation for seminary is good, but having money for seminary so that I can actually study at seminary is more important.
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| So... I guess I haven't been around here in a while. Lot's of stuff is going on these days, of course, but I seem to be less interested in posting it on xanga lately. Maybe it's because I do a lot more of actually talking to people now that I'm back. For those select few of you, however, who actually rely on xanga to hear about what's happening in my life, I thought I'd poke my head in here for a minute.
I'm currently waiting to receive word about teaching English in Japan through the JET Program. I won't find out for another month or so. Meanwhile, I'm working at Taco Bell to pay the bills. If I can't go to Japan, I might head straight for seminary, taking summer Greek in a few months. I still need to apply, though...
Otherwise, not much going on. Just living in Bloomington, waiting for Japan or seminary to come my way. I'd prefer Japan right now, but I definitely want to go to seminary, so... we'll see what God has planned. I'll pop back in here and update you whenever I find out what's happening.
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| So... it looks like I haven't posted here since I left Korea. Is that right? Wow... One month later, I am no longer screaming to go home. I'm just screaming to leave for Japan. I've got three major thoughts running through my mind right now.
First, miserliness. Am I a miser? Have I come to love money? Maybe I'm just being a good steward. That's what I'd like to think. I had been considering making a somewhat large purchase for my family recently, but... now I'm calling that into question. In fact, I've pretty much thrown that idea out the window. There are a lot of reasons for this decision, but... I'm not sure where miserliness fits on the list. I can sure think of a lot of ways to spend the money that I have saved.
Second, submission. This comes in many shapes and sizes. Some people close to me are having a hard time with the idea of submission to the government. I don't know what to say to them anymore. I mean, I understand their struggle. I tend to be pretty self-righteous, but brief reflection on the matter allowed the Spirit to convict me that my hands are dirty, too, to some extent. Heck, I'm even struggling with submission directly to God, quite apart from His mediated authority.
Third, anxiety. This in some sense relates to submission in that I am neither trusting God nor entirely committed to acting according to His plans. Hence, since His plans never fail whether I like them or not, I find myself anxious about the future. Will I get to go to Japan? Will I meet her there? Meanwhile, where will I stay? Where will I work? Will I meet someone while I'm here? Aren't these precisely the sort of questions that Christ tells us are not to be our focus?
Fourth, introspection. Oh, yeah. That's right. There's a fourth. And I could go on. But this is already more than enough. And I hate it when people start sentences with conjunctions. It seriously bothers me looking at my own post seeing that I did it. Something about it just seems wrong to me.
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| It's amazing how much can be accomplished when the pressure gets higher. I finally taped up four boxes and am taking them to the post office tomorrow with Gilman's help. I also took care of some financial stuff today before meeting friends downtown for lunch. I need to really focus, though, Tuesday and Wednesday... I have so much to do before I leave. I hope I can get it all done in time. Otherwise... I'll be in trouble. Heh.
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| So I need to get a new adapter for my laptop's power supply. It's shorted out and is melting my power strip. That's not a good sign. I hope it's not doing anything nasty to my computer, but I am afraid it might be if it's running that hot. I actually burned myself on the freaking thing. I guess I'll head downtown Friday to get it? I don't know... I don't want my laptop to die on me before I can get back home. I've still got lots of stuff to take care of on the net. Pray for this.
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